Monday, July 12, 2010

Letters to Mendoza

I am sending letters overseas (sort of).

And I am completely sure of some things. I am sure that I love my friends. I am sure that I love my music. I am sure that I love my family. I am sure that my surety is right now more pure than it often times is. I am sure too, that I am happy :)

Real happiness is not good grades. Real happiness is not partying with friends. Real happiness is not that special someone that makes you giddy. Real happiness is not even anything with bacon in it.

Am I saying that two people in love are not truly happy?! Am I saying that a bacon turkey bravo can inspire only sorrow?!nay. I am not. I do however, think that one crucial component is too often missing.

A fullness of joy can only be reached when there is intent to live and act righteously. Called me old fashioned. (no but, feel free to call me old fashioned). Call me old fashioned.

BWA!

That exclamation doubled as a smokescreen and segue.

I work at a grocery store. I have tons of time to observe people. I see people yelling at their kids--i see kids yelling at their people. I see old couples fight quietly over choice of bags. I have watched respect, disrespect, and neglect fester. I have seen so much unhappiness.

"how are you?" "I'm doing good thanks"--her eyes are glazed.
"what kind of bags sir?" "paper in plastic"--the corners of his mouth sweep down down and away
"how's your day been" "It's been wonderful"--and they're somewhere else. far gone.

And yet to the untrained eye, they might have all seemed perfectly well. Well enough at least. 'happy' seems to be full until full is really reached, then 'happy' seems, eh.

If you're finding yourself feeling, eh, more often then you'd like, the solution is simple. I'd love to talk with you sometime. I can say I truly am happy :) i have for long periods of time felt the, eh, and the, eh, is despair compared to the fullness of joy i now feel.

The source is pure and great. It runs deep, and never dries.

You don't have time for, eh.

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